I am still kicking. The myspace has taken most of my blog energy. Anyone interested in the other can find me at

I know I've not been updating since forever. Lots has been happening, but I am keeping the myspace current. Oh Well. Bad. Bad. Bad.

I was just reading some things on the internet and came across some news that Alan Rickman was recently in Oregon doing something with My Name is Rachel Corrie. I think that it is a stage play. Awesome. I don't know how to say it except that the man is top-notch, and I adore him. He is a talented performer, and I quiver when I see him as a bad guy. The thrills I get are, shall we say, unmentionable at best? Hmm?

This afternoon the younger girls and I went to see Baba play his normal Sunday game. Sister Cheryl came to watch her husband, too, so we sat in the shade together. It was effing hot today, unseasonably so. I invited them for iftar tomorrow, so that should be good. I'm going to be making some grilled chicken and vegtables with rice and tabloui. For desert, I've got some fruits, both fresh and frozen to throw in the blender with some yogurt for some killer smoothies. They'll be nice in some goblets with a sprig of fresh mint on top. There's something about Ramadan that makes you ultra plan foooooood!

I was going to go the Egyptian route, but we had falafel with the works yesterday, and I cannot stand moulikhia. If I were starved, and had to look at moulikhia in the face, I'd sooner eat grass right out of the ground, roots and all. Moulikhia reminds me of a sneeze gone wrong into your bowl, sopped up with bread or rice. Bleh!

Well, well, well. It's Ramadan again, third fasting day as the moon goes. This Ramadan seems to be going nicely thus far. The years in the past I have stuggled hugely with the cigaratte issue during times of fast. I will readily admit that there were always a day wherein the struggle was so bad that i broke down and had a smoke. The hold them things had on me were in the pimp-daddy range. Me loved them long time. They didn't love me back.

Here I sit, having broke my fast for this day, and it was such an ease  for me in comparison that I cannot even begin to explain the difference between a smokers fast and a nonsmokers fast. Alhamdulilah.

I have almost always face breaking the fast alone. I think I would miss the communal end of each day's fasting if it were not for the fact that I despise all of the things that go along with it. Gossip, mischief mongering, and just plain rudeness are all things that break my spirit down to a great extent. Even now, when I am at my most personally confident phase of my life, and not truly caring what people think of me, I think that being around those elements of "community" are unhealthy for me.  I guess all is well anyway, since it comes to mind that I can't recall the last invitation that I got from anyone, save my sweetheart Fatemh, who tickles the soul of me. We can get down and dirty with one another, and still leave each other with sincere longing to see one another again. By down and dirty, I mean that I can hear things from her that are sincerely intended for my benefit though I may not like them, and I know that she does not intend to break me down as a human being, but really cares that I always be my best person. If she says to me, "Z, that was rather bitchy of you," I take it like the bitch I am being and love her just the same. At the end of each occassion, I feel valued and at the same time make it a point to let her know that I value her. This goes beyond friendship, this is sisterhood. There was a time when I thought that friendship was like the ultimate stage of relationships with people, and being on that list was something that I feared being kicked off of. But now, the me now, says that if I were ever truly given a position of worth with someone, then I should have never feared being so quickly out of graces, or so easily forgot and pushed aside.  A friend may include you to be worthy to be on a list, but doing so only means that youre continually evaluated, judged, and either being approved or disproved of everyday.

There is a saying that I really love:

A believer is someone with whom your are safe from their tongue.

 

And my addition to this, and perception of this, is that the tongue causes big harm, and leaves wounds that may never heal.

 

Ramadan Mubarak!

And mind your tongue!

 

Mel Gibson is crucified anyway. Imagine that.

 

 

MSN poll below.

 

 

 

 

Will you boycott any new Mel Gibson projects because of his alleged anti-Semitic remarks?   * 164868 responses
	Yes. He is dead to me 23%
	No. I will still judge the films on their merits 77%
Not a scientific survey. Click to learn more. Results may not total 100% due to rounding.

As`ad Abukhalil is an awesome all-around guy. Very knowledgable in Middle Eastern affairs. Love listening to him or seeing him on Democracy Now! Plus, we share the same favorite food, fried eggplant. That alone would redeem any short-comings (only some one passionate about eggplant would know).

 

A site that I began visting after researching the death of American nonviolence activist Rachel Corrie, whose precious life was mown down as if a weed in the way.

 

Is a site that I have been reading for a few days after hearing it referred to on LINKtv.

 

 

 

The bleeding heart pro-lifers really, really get to me. Let me first say that I don't believe that abortion is a good thing. I have had 3 miscarriages, and 6 children to prove it. I could never, ever kill an unborn child and live with my conscience. At the same time however, I don't think that I have the right to tell someone else how they ought to make decisions in their life. I say abortion is wrong, and to create a life by negligent actions only to then put out that light of life because it is inconvenient for you is at the very least an indication of a very deep ugliness and selfishness. Beyond disagreeing with the action though, I don't for one second think that I have a right to intrude and inject my thinking into the life of some one else. It is an area where hands can be stayed, unlike, for example, child abuse. 

Bush is another animal altogether. He can sit within the same 24 hour day and allow the lives of innocent people to be destroyed and displaced, with blatant disregard for international law, and then sit and say that the life of an embryo is untouchable and give an embryo the value of a veto. I have an idea for you, Bush:

Use Lebanese and Iraqi embryos.

With my idea, Bush, you can both allow the deaths of Arabs, and save the lives that really matter to you.

 

 

So, I'm reading CNN's webs site and they're taking this poll about whether or not Israel is justified doing what they are doing to Lebanon.

How stupid this poll is, I can't even explain.

Ok, so they say that Hizbullah captured 2 IDF soldiers. Ok, check, I got it. Now, they want for me to say that it is OK to displace 900,000 people, bomb an entire city and other areas of Lebanon, and completely destroy the infrastructure of Lebanon. Did I miss something here? I'm not even figuring in that hundreds of Lebanese people have been killed, and of those hundreds less than 5 were actually Hizbullah soldiers. I don't even think that the equation should include the questionable reports that Hizbullah fired first, because even if they did, the response from Israel is grossly disproportionate to the crime.

No one can say that I am antisemitic either. I not only know Jewish people, I genuinely enjoy thier company. I wish them well, and pray for God to protect them. I look at everyone as a human being, and my principles don't change according to who a victim is, or where they are from, or what they believe. Besides that, I am married and have 5 children from a man who is from semitic ethnic stock. That makes me a semitic lover, so there.

To bomb a country and it's people back to the stone age is not an acceptable response on any moral level. It is particularly disturbing to me that the justification is that two IDF soldiers were taken. The typical thing for those two countries to do is to exchange prisoners.

Disturbing.

 

More... I'm listening today to the news from various sources, tv, radio, people, "The Israelis have  entered  Lebanon." ENTERED, not INVADED. I'm thinking, did someone invite them to tea? You ENTER a place where you're invited, or a place that has an ENTRANCE/WELCOME sign. When you're flying fighter jets, dropping bombs, destroying a place, and come carrying weapons, YOU-ARE-INVADING that place.

Don't insult the intelligence of people and change the complete meaning of words to make yourself feel clean.

I was supposed to have everything done to the house by June so that we could list it with an agent. Not done. I'm still caught up though, in my own way. I've done everything that I can do by myself. The rest I'll need help with, and I've made no secret of that to anyone. IF, if they all really want to make the move south, they'll have to make time and pitch in.

 

We took the trek south to the in-law's place yesterday. Everything went well except we didn't finish the cooking until 10:45 and finally had the food set to eat at 11. I will never eat so much so late again. Starving would be more comfortable. I was effing hungry though 'cuz it had passed 12 hours since I'd eaten. The men watched the Germany/Italy World Cup game. They DVRed it, and almost saw the whole thing again before going out and playing soccer. Completely hopeless soccer nuts, the lot of them.

 

On another note, a friend of mine is passing the year mark of having lost her oldest son. I've been sending thoughts her way weighed down with hopes for goodness and ease in pain of loss.